Ow ow ow

(I wrote this last night) Paige is still in quite a bit of pain. On a positive note she played connect four in the playroom today for a little while. She also drank more than 8 oz of milk, and ate 2 bites of egg. But this evening she was back to grunting and wincing with pain. I think they are going to give her morphine every 2 hours tonight instead of every 4 to help with the pain.



It's frustrating to me that they are only treating the symptoms now, rather than the root of her pain. But we still need to figure out what the root of her pain is. We have an MRI of her spine and hopefully a CT scan of her belly tomorrow, so we should know more by then what is wrong. She will also have a bone marrow biopsy, aspirate, and intrathecal chemo.



Today I went to the hospital chapel to talk to God, and had a good time telling him stuff that was bothering me. Then I borrowed a hymnal, and went to the nearest employee stairwell (chosen for it's acoustical qualities) and sang hymns for a long time. Then a security guard appeared, and said someone had called him to come see what I was up to. Apparently one of the many docs or nurses who had climbed the stairs while I was there was concerned enough to report me. For what, I don't know. The guard said that he had no problem with me being there, but when he left I cried and cried.



I have spent hours over the last three days doing Internet research, to see if I could find anything that might be causing Paige such pain. I have had a few theories, but the one I found tonight seems to be the best match yet. Neutropenic interocolitis. Even if I'm way off, researching gives me something to focus on, and is a way to make me feel like I am being helpful in some way.